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The perfect husband

The scene: the changing room of a golf club. A mobile telephone on a bench rings. A man engages the hands-free speaker-function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

Man: "Hello"

Woman: "Darling, it's me. Are you at the club?"

Man: "Yes"

Woman: "I am at the shopping centre and I've found this beautiful leather coat, only 1 000 pounds. Please, darling, can I buy it?"

Man: "Sure, go ahead if you like it that much."

Woman: "I also passed that Mercedes showroom. There's a new model I really like."

Man: "How much?"

Woman: "70 000 pounds"

Man: "Okay, but for that price, you have to insist on all the options."

Woman: "Great! Oh, and one more thing . . . The house I wanted last year is back on the market. They're only asking 950 000 pounds"

Man: "Well, then go ahead but make them an offer of 900 000. They'll probably take it. If not, we can go the extra 50 thousand. It really is a good one."

Woman: "Okay. I'll see you later! I love you so much!!"

Man: "Bye! I love you, too, darling."

The man hangs up. The others in the changing room are staring at him in astonishment, mouths agape . . .

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Copyright Roy Dickason, October 2002 and April 2019.